“I wish peace and affluence to all my friends and a piece of effluence to all my enemies”

    
    Following the conversation we began last week, it seems appropriate to talk about the essentials ... what needs to be done, to avoid conflict, confusion and having our last wishes not followed. Some apparently obvious factors are not so obvious, even to the most capable people. Presumably, if you have money, your estate plan is smart and up-to-date. Maybe, though, it is time for a review. 

     For younger women who read my blog, a classic error is not starting young enough. Young is, by far and away, best. For elders the most common error is not keeping an estate plan current. Keep in mind legal expertise is so very important, but the quality of advice is not necessarily tied to the amount of money invested. Any woman, who would not touch a copy of Forbes, for example, should. It's a little like an axiom my mother used, "If you do not know how to manage a household, you will be unable to supervise anyone who works in your household." For most of us, this sounds to be straight out of an episode of Downton Abbey. It does, though, translate in terms of financing lives.

     Whether there is a great deal of money, or very little money in the bank, a living will, living trust, (including powers of attorney, one for medical matters, one for financial matters) are key. No matter how often we see stories unfold, in which the critically ill or dying person has no "plans," it is difficult to want to develop the plan. It is not just for your sake, however; it is for the sake of others, who may have to deal with end-of-life decisions under enormous pressure. Publications such as The Five Wishes, can be very helpful. Sometimes, we are compelled to take this form of living will with us for certain procedures at hospitals. Be certain your wishes are expressed in the correct legal form (laws vary from one state to another.)

     Trust is a separate issue, and I've seen it go awry, living in elder housing. Appointing people to carry out our medical and financial wishes is an extremely serious business, regardless of our financial status. It is especially tricky for people who have outlived or are estranged from family. One particularly important rule is never to give medical/legal powers or decision making discretion to a manager in housing. It may sound farfetched, but I've seen this happen. Housing management companies should prohibit this practice among employees.  

     When in doubt, consult a professional. The National Gerontological Society, or your state's equivalent, is a good place to start.